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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

I want to ask for advice from other radfems

how do I connect with other women? like not any age group specifically

I am 18, russian, not lesbian or bi but I have separatist views and hope to become a good ally to LB women; I’m gnc (clothes and no make-up, but not really short hair, I’ve wanted to shave it so it’d be rly short but mom doesn’t allow it). views: radfem (this summer break I will finally read academic literature), interests: I’m a former weeb, play genshin, like maths/physics (unfortunately not too smart for some stuff but I hope I’ll get there). personality: I’m not that insufferable but I suppose I’m neurodivirgent (haven’t been diagnosed but I have been ‘weird’, as my mom says. almost sure I’ve at least got adhd (not in the social contagion way))

I’m graduating soon (last exam in a week) and then I’m going to a university which specializes in STEM, and I’m a bit unsure what awaits me there. In russia stem is really heavily dominated by men, and women are still despised too. also for 4 years I’ve been studying in the school associated with this uni and there are not many girls there especially gnc girls are very rare (and idk some might be even gendies), unfortunately. When we visited the uni mom saw some girls with no make-up and short haircuts and normal clothing and this gives me hope but the uni is huge and idk if I’ll get to learn alongside young women like them. doesn’t help that for the last couple years I haven’t been able to converse properly with other girls (I thought I did!! but I’ve experienced some betrayal and I have trust issues now, within the circle of my peers in this school ofc, not every other woman) and have been stuck “friends” with boys (pls I know I know don’t say anything abt this) who I’ve been able to tolerate most of the time (although yeah the boys are… something). I’ve experienced some bullying in this school so I’ve been afraid of stating my outright opinions (yeah I’m ashamed of my cowardice but I didn’t want to make matters worse). the only other radfem I’ve got in contact with is one of my classmates (whose views I doubt because she’s been wearing objectifying clothes a lot. like yeah condemning boys is all good but it doesn’t put a lot of weight in your words if what you do is only that). so yeah, a lot of problems here

so, any ideas what I could do?

radfems please interact radfems please touch radfem looking for advice
lifewithchronicpain
coochiekrab

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Self proclaimed animal luvr i hate humans internet warrior logic

greenwire

There's actually so much of this self-righteous attitude at no-kill shelters. County shelters have to accept animals that are surrendered to them. No kill shelters can just keep animals until their money runs out and a lot of people feel better about no-kill shelters (for obvious reasons). Some of the biggest gripes I have about shelters include the attitude of keeping animals alive NO MATTER WHAT, so you see a lot of kittens shitting themselves to death because they had no chance at survival, living for weeks in agony in some volunteer's bathroom while shitting blood the whole time.

But this is also a HUGE gripe I have. There's NO GOOD REASON, in their eyes, to ever abandon a pet. I remember a senior female cat who was brought to the shelter because her owner died, and the intake person complained about it to me so much I just had to leave the area. The owner died! What was she supposed to do, exactly? They've been demanding their prospective adoptees never give pets away and only bring them back to the shelter, so why would they get mad that a woman who unexpectedly died didn't have a godparent for her cat?

There's also the typical biases, e.g.: the suburban liberal flavor of racism, where you just kind of find excuses not to adopt animals out to certain families. Don't get me wrong, the outright hatred type of racism is always worse, but this is such an annoying thing that you can never quite prove but you see it over and over again and it gets to you after a while.

The places where I volunteer are pretty cool for the most part, but I sometimes see these behaviors and have no way to call them out on it without it being a fucking ISSUE like I personally hate them or something.

Don't get me wrong. Still support shelters. Support both kinds of shelters if you can. Adopt don't buy. Etc. Of course to all of this. This is only like a 1-5% problem not everyone is like this. But I still had this rant saved up after volunteering in several cities where I've lived, over the last decade or so.

lifewithchronicpain

I know exactly what you mean. When we were looking for a puppy (which my mom insisted on, I would have been fine with a 2 year old) we tried this place that refused our application because we didn't get our last dog heartworm tested during the worst of the pandemic, so he missed a couple tests. It wasn't front of mind anyway, we knew he was dying of old age and he did. We had so many medical records showing almost $2k spent on issues our cat had. (Diagnosing asthma, then an eye injury) so you can see we take care of our animals. But naw, you have to have 3 consecutive heartworm tests or they just won't adopt to you.

So we decided no more trying places with applications and just find a place that lets you show up and get your dog. I found a place 2 hours away and they dropped like 11 puppies ina. First come first serve basis. We got #4 in line, and that's how we got Harry. They have standards. One thing we had to do was go back with my dad because they don't want to adopt out without every person living in the house is cool with it. Reasonable.

We also wanted to go to our favorite city shelter they just had no puppies. That is where I'm going to be fostering kittens from.

But yeah, you're so right, there's such a problem with animal rescue, these people don't want to let their animals go. Maybe they're too clingy or they had a bad experience, but the only way rescue works is if you adopt them out. No one can keep taking and taking and expect to survive financially.

And yeah as much as I hate euthanasia, it has its place and not just helping sick and dying pets. With overpopulation, sometimes the more humane thing is to just lower the population because we straight up don't have the resources to care for these animals. That's the downside to domestication. :/

crestiliafem
crestiliafem

'girl dinner' and its a bunch of sides and a large beverage.

girl dinner should be eating whatever the fuck your heart desires, whether its actually sides or the biggest meal you have ever consumed in your lifetime.

im tired of the assumption that women dont eat much, if you think women dont have a big appetite you have not seen me, thats just another stereotype that i will beat.

although this is meant as a lighthearted post, the assumption women dont eat much is cause we gotta be all petite and cute, which is shit.

so i repeat, girl dinner ≠ small amount of food.

girl dinner = yum yum eat whatever you want.

goblinous
loveisbraveandwild

tea is hot

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radsloth95

THIS. Even when male artists feature on female artist's songs with misogynistic lyrics, no one gives a shit. For example, the song Close to Me by Ellie Goulding features a second verse by Diplo which includes such lyrics such as:

You can never come too close for comfort

I had to cut my bitch off, she bein' stubborn (stubborn)

I make it known I fuck with you, not undercover ('cover)

And when I jump in, I'm burnin' rubber (yeah, skrrt)

Or there is the ever iconic Havana by Camilla Cabello, where the bridge by Young Thug has these lyrics:

Fresh out East Atlanta with no manners, damn (fresh out East Atlanta)

Bump on her bumper like a traffic jam

Hey, I was quick to pay that girl like Uncle Sam (here you go, ayy)

Back it on me (back it up)

Shawty cravin' on me, get to eatin' on me (on me)

She waited on me (then what?)

Shawty cakin' on me, got the bacon on me (wait up)

This is history in the makin', on me (on me)

Point blank, close range, that B

If it cost a million, that's me (that's me)

I was gettin' mula, baby

So it's completely fine for men to sing about objectifying women and then paying them for sex and to describe women with derogatory terms, but the second a woman says anything remotely negative about another woman's sexual reputation in a song, they are the ones that get called out? The offending lyric that T-Swift was so "unfeminist" for recording back in 2010?

She's not a saint and she's not what you think, she's an actress

And she's better known for the things that she does on the mattress

I am not saying that her lyrics are okay, but I want a world where male artists are cancelled for calling us sluts and bitches via song lyrics before women are cancelled for far less problematic verses.

floradfem

so many songs would be better without the males being featured on it, they usually ruin the whole vibe

goblinous

"Bring Me to Life" by Evanescence comes to mind. The guy doesn't even sing anything offensive, he just has such a shitty voice that he's singlehandedly responsible for a ton of mockery. To make matters worse, Amy Lee didn't want male vocals, but her label forced her to add a male vocalist to the lead single because god forbid men be excluded from anything.

Fortunately she got to rerelease a version without him, but the whole thing makes me wonder how many women have been forced to include misogynistic men in their music.

antiyourwokehomophobia2
antiyourwokehomophobia2

I feel like some feminists really like the idea of women acting as uncaring as men do. I don't know about any of y'all, but I don't like the idea of living in a world where everyone acts like the most entitled and terrible man you could think of. What kind of world is that to look forward to? A world where women are mean and selfish and callous? Why is that a sentiment I've seen way too many feminists push? If I'm talking and a woman interrupts me, I'm not going to enjoy it more than a man interrupting me lmao. A future like that is bleak. I'm all for women standing up for themselves and being confident and all of that, but if you see a woman helping someone/being kind and think "that's female socialization and that's bad" then you've got to realize that you are indirectly saying that male socialization is better lmao. I've seen people say "true female gender non conformity is being mean and awful" and "you're mad that I, a woman, am not being nice to you because you think all women should be pleasant" and that's insane to me. We should not want to emulate the awful behavior of asshole men. There is a middle ground between being a pushover and being a complete asshole and I think a few of you guys need that reminder tbh 💀